Essence Paperback – July 11, 2013

I really wanted to like this novel.I mean, I've watched a video or two on YouTube by the author--Mandi Lynn and she seems so enthusiastic a reader AND a writer, that she even gives advice and whatnot on the whole process of what it means to write and to self-publish.I mean, she really comes off like she knows what she is talking about.So, why is it then that she just can't seem to get out of her way when it comes to writing her OWN novel?It's like as I'm reading this story, I just get this nagging feeling like the story is going on like: 'And then. And then. And then. And then THIS happens. And then THAT happens. And then. And then. And then. And then.'And then WHAT???I mean, this particular author seems to REALLY enjoy the act of describing EVERYTHING.And after a while, it just seems too much.Like all of the description gets in the way of the novel truly beginning and jumping off to something.It's like just get out of the way and let your story begin already.It would be like hearing about someone going to the supermarket to pick up what they needed for their dinner, and then all you heard was--'The store, it was filled with so many things. Different cans, marked with labels. Some were corn and some were soup. Some were tomatoes. The store, it ALSO had produce. Fruits AND vegetables. There were lettuce--romaine, iceberg, arugula. Potatoes--white, red and even sweet. There were other vegetables too.'I mean in the end, all this person needed was a pack of pork chops, so why can't they just get their pork chops???Sometimes, you can give an audience too much and it becomes just THAT: TOO MUCH.And the audience can lose their way in the plot of your story.Like your story is ONLY about these 'things' that you've filled it with and not much more.I mean, that's how I was feeling while trying to read this story.First and foremost, I didn't understand where it wanted to go because of ALL of its description.There didn't seem to be a good balance between describing things and character interactions--to where you get to my favorite part of practically ANY story--and that's dialog. (Not that dialog is EVERYTHING), because it certainly isn't.Only for me, dialog is one of the main things that I look forward to when I read virtually ANYTHING.Also, I look forward to character development.Only to have that, you really need other characters to interact with.And I would tell the author, would it really have been such a crime, to have had other characters come into your story earlier on to have this Amelia character have someone/ANYONE to interact with?It just seems like so much of what we are seeing is coming from out of her own head and psyche, that this story never seems to be grounded or really balanced with the here and now of her life.Like how does all of this interact with her day to day life and trials?Now to get to a part where I feel there is too much direction, or really that the scene is overly directed, I'll talk about a scene that takes place on page 32 (this is on my 'Kindle', so I'm not sure if this is the actual page or what?) But here it is--'The first box I grab is marked Shampoo and Stuff. It's small but heavy. I put the shampoo, conditioner, and other soaps on the side of the tub, and everything else in a cupboard under the sink. The other two boxes are towels, toothbrushes, deodorant, and anything else you will find in a bathroom or linen closet. After finding a place for everything, I head out to the hallway again and see my mom standing at the top of a ladder.'Now how I think this whole passage could've been handled better, would've been--'The first box I grab is marked Shampoo and Stuff. I put its contents away and then proceed with the other boxes that are marked for the bathroom.When I see my mom again, she is standing on top of a ladder in the hallway.'Now this is a bit of a shorthand, but I think it works in that it gives your reader 'just what they need to know' and your story can keep moving and isn't so cluttered.I mean, it's like you don't need to 'laundry list' EVERYTHING.It's like your readers will get a LOT of this information--you know, the 'in between stuff' and the 'over direction' really isn't needed.Or even the part when Amelia is in the kitchen with her dad, AGAIN the story gets cluttered with WAY too much description.I mean, do we REALLY need to know that while her dad is in the kitchen making his 'famous' eggs, that Amelia can smell bagels in the toaster (here's the part we DON'T need) 'crisping to a perfect golden-brown'.This part is overkill and is NOT necessary.You really just want to set up your scene and then move forward.All of the little addendums only add and build up to clutter that your story doesn't need. (Really, it doesn't need it at all).And this is shortly after, regarding Amelia's dad making her eggs.Do we REALLY need to read--'He turns back to the stove, and flips and mixes the eggs to cook them evenly.'(Can't your father just cook you the eggs already?)AGAIN with the over direction.Moving on, how Amelia (or now I guess she's going by the name Emma) meets her school's 'tour guide', seems a little unrealistic.I mean, like they're just going to meet each other in front of the school?Really?What would've been more realistic, would've been if say Emma had to go to the school office, you know to get her list of classes and then at that office, she could've been introduced to this so-called 'tour guide'.I mean, sometimes it's all in how you set things up.Because to just have them fall in your lap, that doesn't always ring true.(And we DO find out that this Sadie character isn't really Emma's 'official' tour guide, she just likes helping out new students).WHO does this sort of thing?Especially, first thing in the morning.I mean, I could even see if an intro was made at her Biology class (or whatever) and the teacher made the intro.Like she assigned this Sadie person to be her lab partner and then their friendship just could've grew.Also, there were words that I found distracting. Words like:· Descend = while coming down from a ladder· Ascend = while going up some stairs· Reverberates = energy that comes off of this girl· Venturing = Going through (as in an action)· Scanning = Looking or glancing(Keep in mind, that these words are MORE than appropriate to use based off of their pure definitions--only they are distracting just the same, because they are NOT a part of 'normal' or what I'd like to think 'everyday' speech patterns).The below is yet ANOTHER example of 'over direction'.The part when Amelia is taking her shower, you don't have to necessarily show Amelia 'stepping out of the shower.' To transition from the shower, you can just go to a new paragraph.Like in the beginning, you could say something like--'After my harrowing time in the forest, I feel the need to calm myself.I take a shower.Only when that doesn't seem to do the trick, I make myself a snack.'(We, the audience don't need to see Amelia step in and out of the shower. We don't even need to worry about what her snack is?) Because the point of her doing all this is to get over the trauma of her experience in the forest.Also, I don't like that this particular author doesn't seem to care for the ONE thing that I really love. And that is dialog.For me, this story (certainly at the beginning) REALLY seems to exist with Amelia and ONLY Amelia.And sometimes that's just not fun.It's like you get all of these monologue or dialogues that only exist with her and yet still you don't really know her because she's not playing off of anyone else.It's like you don't know if Amelia is good or a 'mean girl' or WHATEVER?Because she's NOT interacting with other people.And that's just not a good thing at all.This is when Amelia's mom is home from work:'As soon as she reaches the kitchen counter, she dumps her handful of papers.'(Now the problem that I have with just this sentence is that I didn't know that the mom was even carrying a handful of papers?)It's like this scene needed a proper set-up first. (And this is where description would've been useful).Like you went--'While cleaning up the kitchen...' (and this incidentally seemed like a quick transition from Amelia having her cereal and hot milk), '...my mom walks in, back from her work at a research station somewhere in the White Mountain National Forest. As soon as she reaches the counter, she dumps her handful of papers.'It's like why would Amelia's mom need to have a handful of papers?It's like the author is just trying to fabricate an action to have the mom do something.And even something as small as this, rings false.Like she doesn't really need to be doing this action at all.A better transition would've been, to have Amelia finish her snack, maybe go back to her room, and then she could've found her mother coming home.Maybe she would've had her hands full with these 'papers' and then maybe Amelia could've helped her with them or WHATEVER?But what I'm getting at is that when you want to give an action to something it really needs to have a purpose or why even bother with the action at all.It's like how chapter 5 begins with Amelia and her dad.It's like they're in the car driving around and there's NO conversation between them. (I don't know what this is all about?)And I REALLY don't understand why the author here won't use dialog in her story.It's just sad really.Like ALL of the missed opportunities to have SOMETHING.And to gain insight even.I mean, your characters have to talk sometimes.Right???(Also, I found it odd that Amelia and her dad were driving for hours (no less) and 'we' the audience didn't get to hear ANY of their conversations.)Later in this chapter the mom makes an announcement that she's got the week off from work so that the family can go camping.So, why does Amelia have to ask her mom 'how long will they be camping?' (BTW, the mom answers--'A week'. Well, duh!)If this is what the author feels is good dialog and writing--something that's worth publishing, then I don't know what???Also, her mother just wouldn't get a week off for vacation just like that.And I don't think she'd just spring this whole camping trip on her family like that.I mean, that's rude.And no family would go for that.Though how the author could've explained this was to have this vacation AND the trip already planned.Like they already had it in the works from the Spring. I mean, for the readers it might seem like something that's being dropped into our laps, but for the family, it could've been something that was already on their schedule.Like maybe this was even an annual thing. (It's writing like this, that REALLY makes me think that this author REALLY isn't ready to be published. Just little things like this, she should know).Because to do otherwise, your content really WON'T ring true.Or even make sense.Regarding chapter 6(This is about the mom's note).No one and I mean, NO ONE would write a note that goes: '...Your father and I went into town to buy some groceries. We were going to tell you, but you were sound asleep. We will be back later today. Love you, Mom.'For the sake of your story, the note should've read: 'Went to get milk. Will be back shortly. Love, Mom.Now the reason I use 'milk' is that sometimes you can't get along without it--like first thing in the morning, thus necessitating her mother or BOTH (???) her parents needing to go out to get it. Other groceries might be able to wait and you don't necessarily have to leave first thing in the morning.Also, we (the audience) don't need to read that her parents went 'into town'--that goes without saying that that's where the grocery store is.It's also not necessary for the note to read that her parents were going to let Amelia know (that they were going to the grocery--though they decided not to tell her because she was 'sound asleep'--we can figure that much out).Also, how long does it take to go shopping?When you use a statement like 'later today', it makes it seem as though her parents left to go shopping at eight in the morning and only God knows when they'll be back.Like they're taking a road trip or something.And if they are, then why not say that?Why NOT have her parents go for a little day trip or whatever--that would CLEARLY explain the need to use the expression 'Later today.'It's like with this author, something as small as a note can ALSO be served up heavy-handedly.And as an author, you should really watch out for stuff like that.Because you're giving your readers more than they really need.And sometimes 'more' can be too much. (Also, BOTH of her parents weren't needed to go to the grocery store).This, to me, only allowed for yet MORE alone time for Amelia.And I'm always going to think that Amelia needs MORE interaction with other characters.Not less.Later in this chapter, Amelia goes (this is her narration, mind you), with her going--'The chores finish fast, leaving me to surrender to the TV.'SURRENDER TO THE TV!Who, I'm asking talks this way or even THINKS this way?Using a word like 'surrender' makes your writing sound overly lush when maybe you don't want it to be that way.Also in this story, there's this thing about mist.And when we finally find out what all this 'mist' business is, I want to...I REALLY wanted to stop reading.It's like (without giving anything away), the word 'half' comes into play.And what this mist represents (that I won't reveal) the word 'half' just CAN'T come into play.I mean, it's either all or nothing.Half?Really???Oh boy.Then getting back to the color of the mist, Amelia REALLY wants to know why this particular mist was orange because something else in this story was red.But then following that logic (WHATEVER logic we can apply???) There's a purple mist.And why it's purple, I'll NEVER know???Given Amelia's logic, I could tell you what color it should be--only that might be giving something away.And I won't do that.Promise!Then there's this whole business about 'haunting' and that anybody can learn to do it.Really???I think I'm done.This is the FIRST time that I've bothered to put in a review of a book that I have NOT finished.But, it's like I don't want to.I don't want...I'm NOT finishing this novel.Simply put, I was bored by it.Amelia or Emma or whatever her name is didn't fascinate me as a character.I could not get behind her and root for her or care about her at all.This book...goodness, is not for me.It didn't hold my interest.It was inundated with WAY too much information on mundane things.Not ENOUGH information on things that mattered.Hardly ANY dialog.And not ANY character development.It also had what I'd like to call 'convenient' writing that tried to explain things that really shouldn't have needed to be explained.And I just couldn't finish this.I mean, if a book can't 'grab' me at over 25 percent of the way, then WHAT IS THE POINT???Life's WAY too short to read something that's just not good or worth reading.Sorry.And my apologies to the author, but this book...I can COMPLETELY understand why you received more than a few rejections on this. : (

This book started out slow which almost made me not read it becasue I am a person who likes a book to get right into the story with no dragging along. Usually when this happens I won't read the story, but I just decided to read this book because I am a subscriber to Mandi Lynn on her Youtube channel, and I just decided I should read this book even if it took me awhile. I have to admit that I'm glad that I stuck this out because by the time I got to Chapter 5 the story started to pick up and without giving any spoilers away I actually was surprised by the premise of this book. Of course, being a self-published author myself I don't think I would have titled this book "Essence", I think I would have titled it: "Phantom Lagoon" where it seems as if the mystery of this whole story seemed to be surrounded by it. I have to applaud Mandi Lynn, although for writing this book when she was just 16 years old. BTW I loved the ending to this story.

I didn’t know what to expect when I picked up Essence, but what I found was a story that delves into the big questions about life, death, family and what it means to be human. All of it done in a way that’s relatable for the average teen or adult to grasp without being preachy. I was stirred emotionally throughout thanks to the vivid prose and engaging characters and relationships. Though in many cases, said relationships end up heartbreaking.Essence follows Emma, who finds herself on an unexpected journey after moving to New Hampshire. The supernatural elements come into play right at the beginning and play well into the themes of the book. It’s a bit slow to start after the prologue, but after the plot kicks in, it’s very hard to put down, especially after the halfway mark. And don’t get me started on the ending.It’s clear that Mandi Lynn has poured her heart into writing her debut novel and it has paid off, and I look forward to reading more of her books in the future.

I gave this debut book a 5 star rating because it was a marvelous first novel. It caught my attention right from the beginning prologue and was a page after page of riveting suspense This author's first book showed her keen insight into the heart and minds of real people and especially capturing the mother and daughter relationship. This is an emotionally riveting story about a teenager torn apart by conflicting needs and a passionate love to return to her human life. I find this young and new author to be able to write with a fine touch, with a sharp eye for details and a firm grasp of the complexity of human relationships. She is starting to become a classic storyteller with a unique insight into the only emotions that really matter.A wonderful novel, glowing with the insight and compassion of an artist's touch.I can't wait to read her next novel!

I loved reading this book! The chapters were short, which made me get the through the book a lot faster. Spoil I wish that Garret could have made a small appearence in the book. I would have liked to see him find Luna and then get back together. That would have been cute. I hope Mandi can traditionally publish one of her newer books soon! Both I Am Mercy and Essence are amazing!

I bought this book because I have gotten a lot of value from watching the authors youtube channel, which documents the young authors progress to write and publish her first novel.Her writing style seems perfectly fine to me, but where this book left me bored was the need for conflict. I often would finish a chapter and have no urge to read the next. Through much of the middle I got lost because there didn't seem to be a clearly defined goal.That's not to say I didn't like the idea. I was fascinated with that, it's only too bad the group she was with was so uninteresting.I do suspect Mandi will write more and greater books because the dedication I witnessed on her channel is inspiring.

I went into reading this book not knowing anything about it. I was pleasantly surprised. It had a lot of components I don't usually see in the usual books I read. I would recommend it.

Amazing novel! You’d be mad not to enjoy it. I thoroughly enjoyed it from start to finish. I highly recommend.

Good book!

Mandi has a great writing style that draws a reader into a world familiar yet wildly strange. I could feel everything Emma felt and didn't feel. Fantastic story!

I loved this book. It made me think, it made me cry. I highly recommend this novel!