Single On Purpose: Prioritizing Self-Love and Personal Growth in Your Journey Through Life, Dating, and Relationships

I never expected to be divorced at age 70, after 32 years of marriage and 36 years being with my, now, "Ex." Many of us, men or women, have no clue how much we define ourselves by our roles: Husband, Father, Wife, Grandmother, etc. I suffered the common loss of friends who "sided" with my "Ex" because she very strategically got rid of ALL of MY friends just before we got married. I had given up listening to her whining: "They don't like me", etc. So, we made friends together, but most were from my Ex-wife's life before me. We were friends for 36 years, and yet, those old, longer friendships dominated in their perceived need to "pick" who they were going to be friends with. Somehow divorce always means a loss of friendships. So, everything I defined "ME" by was stripped away: I was no longer a "husband" and no longer a "friend" to so many people that were in my life for 36 years. This all happened when both of my kids moved out and got married and engaged...their lives are moving on as well, so my role as the "Father" that I always was, is now over as well. This book helps you realize that you need to accept these changes and to redefine yourselves as being "comfortable" with your new identity as a "single person." You get move on into other meaningful relationships in your life, if you are still trying to hold onto roles and the feelings those roles defined you by, when they no longer exist. The "old you" is gone forever, and you must accept it, and decide what you are going to do in accepting it and newly-defining who you are as a single person in your new world. This all has to happen before you can successfully start and keep meaningful new, long-term relationships. So...I am now learning to be a "new me"...still a father, but in a different way, and I am trying to figure out where a 70 year man can meet similar people. At 70, you are retired, so no new work friendships. You don't go to bars/clubs etc. And as an aged person, you discover how much your age group is ignored. I even attend a large church that has dedicated, co-ed services and activities for teenagers, singles and couples aged 20-40, but absolutely nothing for people over 40. We are ignored. So, I have to discover new places to meet people as the "new me" so I can further develop me as a friend to them. That, again, all begins by me getting maximally comfortable with being "new single me." This book helps you understand that and how to move forward. There is a second book: a 31-day "program" of something to do on a daily basis, to help you get there. I recommend this book. You do have to be comfortable with profanity though...for some dumb reason, this author - a therapist - felt it necessary and in his comfort zone, to string all of the various profanities that we know, in the written text of the book. I found myself asking: "why did he write that...why was that edited out?" Oh well.

This book felt like a conversation with someone who truly understands self-growth and independence. John Kim writes with honesty there’s no sugarcoating, just real talk about learning to love yourself, rediscover your identity, and enjoy being alone. I appreciated how it mixed humor with depth, making heavy topics feel approachable. Some sections hit me harder than expected, especially about self-worth and rebuilding confidence. It’s not just for people going through breakups it’s for anyone learning how to be okay on their own and build a life that feels whole.

If you’re even thinking about buying this book… just get it. If you’re single recently, single for too long, maybe thinking about being single… this is the book for you

Read it if you are single on purpose. This books gives you so much insight that you will read it again.

After a recent break up, I was looking to fill my time with a new hobby of reading. When choosing a book, I chose "self-help" to help me manage my emotions and behaviors moving forward. I couldn't have chosen a better book. The authors diagram of his own personal life events and experiences were SO relatable. His breakdown of coping methods geared to each type of struggle was easy to understand and really fueled my motivation to get things done for myself. Not only to take care of myself better in future relationships, but in general. The way the book was written was so easy to read and understand that I couldn't put it down and finished the whole thing in way less time than I anticipated. I'm definitely going to look into his other work. Excellent book.

This was a very interesting, straight forward resourceful book. It gave any reader insight how to better themselves from anything that could be holding them back from being the best version of yourself. This book allowed me to look within and do self-evaluation. It also allowed me to look for areas that I could improve and do better toward the old baggage I was yet dealing from past relationships. The therapist was very knowledgeable toward the information that was given. I could appreciate him giving his own life experience, so one could feel he could relate to others who may choose to read this material. One negative thing that I did not like about the book, is that he used profanity throughout the book. I felt he gave great illustration and viewpoints, and the profanity was just an expression that did not add to the reading, only was in the way of anyone who took this book seriously and wanted help in becoming whole and different after reading this. This statement is not to down the writer, only to say that it wasn't needed and could be easily left out in my opinion. Thanks for providing great material. I would definitely purchase another book by this author in the future.

Best post break up book I have ever read. Real, down to earth, honest, thought provoking and funny

A lot of the experiences i can relate. Being half Asian and the cultural differences, but also being able to find my way can lead to struggle and disappointment in my life and my parents. I think this has carried me through my life and with my recent divorce has made me bitter, but I know it'll fade and eventually go away. So many learning lessons in this book. A lot of times you just have to go through the fire. I'm just going go find myself again before anyone else. Not gonna rescue anyone but myself. Learned a tough lesson in that one, but it's my time go learn, heal, and grow.

This book need to be read. There is so many things that I can relate as a single person. I learn trough my journey to love myself everyday. And I know that by doing so ,I m going to be a better version of myself. I think when I'm going to be on a slippery road, I m going to read it again. Well done M. John (Chucky) Kim. Glad that you find your partner Vanessa.

Brings a new perspective for single people. Gives practical ideas that we can all try. Nice stories easy to read and get the message. Thanks to the author for sharing!

no me gustó que llegara en malas CONDICIONES COMO ROTO

A wonderfully written book full of uplifting, empowering advice. Funny, raw and relatable, this one is highly recommended for anyone who is single, married, in a relationship or contemplating getting into one. John writes straight from the heart!

Benché è vero che, come sottolineato in altre recensioni, sembri di leggere il diario di una persona e della sua storia personale, i contenuti all'interno vanno digeriti e pensati nell'ottica della propria esperienza. Credo, come molti altri che l'hanno letto, che le prospettive di vita e il modo di pensare di molti di noi si possano rifare all'esperienza di Kim, che peraltro è un valido terapeuta. Forse il costo dell'edizione Kindle è un po' elevato considerato che è un digitale